A recent “Fidelity Survey” in Playboy magazine asked 1,432 married men and women if they had ever cheated on their partner. Seventy-five percent of men and 82 percent of women said no. Half the men and 66 percent of the women even said they’ve never even entertained thoughts of infidelity.

Not to sound absolutely cynical, and not to put down the hard work of the sociologists behind this study, but I’m dubious about the results. Especially given that Playboy readers are groomed to fantasize about doing it with a different Pet or Playmate each month!

So there I was, maneuvering through Times Square on a bustling Saturday afternoon. I typically avoid TS unless absolutely necessary; I can’t handle the droves of gawking tourists staring skyward at giant glossy sneaker ads and chain restaurants, but unfortunately, this was an “absolutely necessary” situation. I took a deep breath and darted through the crowds. Waiting to cross Broadway, I stared blankly at the billboard up, up and ahead of me, among souvenir stores, theaters and a McDonald’s. I’d seen the image hundreds of times before—two bikini-clad buxom blondes standing superimposed before close-ups of their faces, in front of a red and yellow background. The billboard had probably been up for ages, I assumed, probably an ad for a clothing company or energy drink. It took me over a full minute to realize, after crossing the street away from the enormous sign, exactly where I’d seen it before. I hadn’t been staring at a nameless model on that billboard; I was looking at porn superstar Jenna Jameson—the ad was for her film “Krystal Method.”

“It’s porn!” I yelled out. A giant, glossy porn ad, smack in the middle of The New Times Square, the Disneyworld of New York City. Sure, such a billboard would have fit right into the Times Square of the seventies and eighties, adult-entertainment center that it once was. But in post-Guiliani NYC, such an ad is unexpected. Are things changing back to the scandalous days of old, or is porn (of the Vivid Video genre) getting that mainstream and Disney-fied itself, so as to fit comfortably in with Planet Hollywood and the Olive Garden?

Later on in her life, Marilyn Monroe apparently confessed she’d never had an orgasm. Yes, Marilyn—sex symbol of the 20th century, lover of many lovers—may have never had an orgasm. Mind you, you can’t believe everything you read on the Internet, but even if it’s not true the thought still makes me sad. I wonder…might this mean JFK had lackluster cunnilingus skills? Does anyone know where Marilyn’s buried? I’d like to make a pilgrimage to put a Wahl 7-in-1 on her grave.