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Do straight guys like anal? Part 1
I was supposed to teach a workshop on male anal penetration last night but it was canceled due to poor ticket sales. Needless to say I’m sad, because we worked really hard on it and I was really excited to teach it.
I did get a chance to talk about it a little bit when I was teaching a private workshop recently and during a conversation about anal sex where women are the receivers, I mentioned that if someone was having trouble getting their partner to understand just how slowly they need to take the anal play, that they could always switch it up and offer to penetrate their partner.
This was met with giggles and cheers but also this statement: “That’s just nasty. If I was with a guy and he wanted me to do that, I would tell him to get off of me because that means he’s gay”.
I was really glad that this came up because it’s something that a lot of people believe. We have a habit of really compartmentalizing sexuality into certain things that only certain people do. It’s hard for many people to understand how lesbians have sex because they can’t imagine anything beyond penis-vagina. Likewise, anal sex is paired with gay men even though there are a great many gay men who do not enjoy having their asses played with or even playing with other people’s asses. Meanwhile, there are plenty of non-gay men who thoroughly enjoy having their asses played with.
I love talking about male-anal penetration because it helps get us out of that compartmentalizing. There’s a wonderful inventiveness, exploration, role reversal and many other things that can come from a little anal play with a boyfriend, if you’re both into it of course.
June 23rd, 2008 at 10:47 am
Do straight guys like anal? Yes.
June 24th, 2008 at 7:11 pm
I was really glad that this came up because it’s something that a lot of people believe.
And that just absolutely dumbfounds me. I mean, by definition “gay” involves someone of the same sex. You can’t be GAY if you’re having sex with someone of the opposite sex. These folks just have defective reasoning skills, apparently.
June 26th, 2008 at 2:00 pm
You are ahead of your time. But just barely.
I know my husband and I never had successful anal sex until I encourage him to try a prostate stimulator, which turned into him exploring other anal toys.
Now he gets it, and it works, and we’re having more fun than ever. But honestly, he’s well ahead of the curve, and that “you put things up your ass you must be gay” stigma for het men is still thoroughly ingrained.
July 17th, 2008 at 9:42 am
[…] I love Heather Corinna. If you haven’t checked out Scarleteen, you must. It’s the best teen-oriented website for sex info that I’ve ever seen and it’s written in a way that is interesting for adults too. On RH Reality Check this week, Heather guest blogged about the prostate, answering a question that I hear all of the time at Babeland and one that I addressed a few weeks ago here. Q: I’m not gay, but I like my butt and anus played with. Can someone tell me why? […]